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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24534115">Cruelty always works in the movies</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Multifandom_damnation/pseuds/Multifandom_damnation'>Multifandom_damnation</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Chicago PD (TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Brotherly Affection, Brotherly Bonding, Brotherly Love, Episode: s07e10 Mercy, Gen, Heart-to-Heart, Hospitalization, Hurt Jay Halstead, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, Injury Recovery, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Missing Scene, Protective Siblings, Self-Indulgent, Vulnerability</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-06-04</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-06-04</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-04 10:13:23</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Graphic Depictions Of Violence</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>3,540</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24534115</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Multifandom_damnation/pseuds/Multifandom_damnation</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Jay has never liked hospitals, has never been able to stand their sterile white walls and the constant needles and horrible hospital food and itchy sheets. His body ached something fierce, his shoulder felt detached from himself with all the medication he'd been given to distance himself from the pain, and he was somehow so, unbelievably, inconceivably lonely. But his older brother was there to take care of him, even if Jay doesn't want him to, even if he probably has a lot of things to do, but Will isn't going to let him sit and rot in a hospital bed alone for whoever knew how long.</p>
<p>Besides, what else were big brothers for?</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Jay Halstead &amp; Will Halstead</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>24</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>89</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Cruelty always works in the movies</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>As you know from my previous fics, I haven't watched the show so I don't know exactly what's going on during the episodes but I have seen many clips on YouTube and felt the need to write this fic. I love the Halstead bros, and I can't believe that considering Jay was in the hospital for a while, we were only given like... one scene with Will? Like, his brother is in the hospital!! We couldn't get a single scene with Will and Jay? I don't know, if that did happen and I just haven't seen it yet, please link it or something in a comment or something?? I really want to see it. I just... I really had to write this fic. The recent episodes have had everything I love in a gritty gripping show, and I'm glad that I don't have to write it myself haha. </p>
<p>Chicago Fire and Chicago P.D are being aired on my TV now, but I struggle to watch PD because though I love the characters and I love the story, some of the interactions just... make me so damn angry and I hate it?? Like, everyone is always yelling and fighting and Voight is always being a dick?? Like, if someone spoke to me like the way Voight speaks to a lot of his team, Jay, for example, I would leave and never speak to him again, no matter how much the job meant to me, you know?? And the characters are treated so badly!! I don't know. I love a lot of it, but not many of the interactions. I don't know, maybe it's just me.</p>
<p>Anyway, I hope you enjoy this because I had a lot of fun writing it, and I hope it's a fun read to x</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Jay woke up in the hospital on his third night after the abduction to a needle being removed from his arm and, overcome with a sudden irrational panic, instinctually reached out to grab the wrist of the nurse walking away before they could get too far. He was only a little surprised to see Will, looking down at him with an amused expression, moving the used and empty needle from his trapped hand to his free hand so he could place it in the neon yellow sharps box hanging from the wall. “Welcome back to the world of the living.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Once he was finally able to breathe again, Jay squeezed his fingers a little tighter around Will’s hand, and Will just raised his eyebrows in response as he just waited patiently. “If you ever put a needle in me again,” he said slowly. “I’ll break every damn bone in your hand.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>When Jay finally let him go, Will snorted and mocked him under his breath in a slightly higher pitched voice as he shimmied around the bed to sit on the other side, where a chair had already been dragged up to the edge from the corner of the room. “It was just a flu shot. I thought that if I was going to get it into you, it was now or never, and what better time then when you were already asleep?” Will rolled his eyes as he sat down heavily on the chair. “You’re so bad with needles. I can never understand it. You’re more than happy to have a gun pressed up against your head on a daily basis but you’d rather get hit by a firetruck at full speed than willingly walk into a hospital for a check-up.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Can you blame me? This place sucks. I can’t believe you enjoy being here every day,” Jay retorted, and Will chuckled. He strained his neck as far as he could from where he was resting against a massive pile of pillows to look around the room, even behind Will. “Where is everyone?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Shrugging, Will busied himself with taking off his lab coat and maroon work shirt and folding them in his lap before he answered. Jay watched him silently. “Atwater and Ruzek were here for a while. Voight called them back to base, said that there was a new case that needed looking into. Something about a home invasion or a bust or something just as dangerous, I don’t know, I didn’t really listen. I convinced them to go. But they were here.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Jay watched him with narrowed eyes as he reached around the chair and pulled an overnight bag from somewhere Jay couldn’t see it, and began to pull a loose-fitting shirt out and shove his work clothes in. “What are you doing?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Making a face, Will paused in pulling the shirt over his head, the soft navy fabric pilled up around his elbows. “What does it look like I’m doing? I’m getting comfy. I’m going to be here for a while.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Will, you’re on duty. You’ve got a job to do,” Jay said like it was obvious. Because it was. Again, he said, “What are you doing?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I’m not on shift,” Will snorted. “Besides, I <em>am</em> working. I’m babysitting my brother who was comatose not too long ago and making sure he doesn’t escape in the middle of the night when he should be getting his much-needed treatment.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Escape, huh?” Jay repeated. “Are you keeping me hostage?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Will shrugged again. It had been too long since they had last seen each other, and though the circumstances weren’t the brightest, Jay missed that smile. “It depends on how well you co-operate. Hailey left me a set of handcuffs before she left, and gave me permission to cuff you to the bed if I had to.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Sure,” Jay snorted. “As if you know how to use handcuffs. You were always the guy getting put in them, not the other way around. You wouldn’t even be able to find your way out of a paper bag let alone manage to use a set of handcuffs properly.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>A wicked grin curled across Will’s face and Jay instinctually leant away as much as he could as Will leaned forward, every muscle in his body screaming with the movement. “No worry, Rojas made sure I knew exactly how they worked before she left.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Wow,” Jay grumbled. “Great. So much for looking after me.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Laughing, Will settled back and rubbed his hands together. “I am going to look after you. Maggie let me switch my shifts with Dr Marcell, so I can look after you a little bit. I’m going to stay here tonight and just make sure you’re doing OK. Speaking of, how are you feeling? Any pain? Be honest.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Gritting his teeth, Jay leaned his weight against the pillows. Honestly, he was in agony, every nerve in his body flaring up in unbelievable pain, his very soul aching with something fierce and angry, his wrists still burned and his fingers still trembling from the memory of being tied up for so long with very little movement that didn’t involve pain. His shoulder was screaming at him like he had been set on fire and no amount of rolling around on the hard concrete would ever put it out. “I’m fine,” he lied. “I feel much better than when they first brought me in. You’ve got nothing to worry about.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Sure, sure. Your team might let you get away with a shitty lie like that, but I’m your big brother, and I know you better than that.” Willy said simply as he reached over and pressed Jay’s morphine button a couple of times and watched with worried eyes as the tense set of his jaw and the stiffness in his shoulders relaxed as he sunk into the pillows and a calm expression softened his features. “That’s much better, hey tough guy?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I thought I told you no needles,” Jay mumbled.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I didn’t give you any new needles, but you never said anything about using the needles that are already in you,” Will said and held back a laugh at the way Jay pouted. “I’m also here to make sure you don’t pull out any of these very important needles, so don’t even think about it.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You’re no fun,” Jay complained.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Actually, I am known primarily by everyone as 'the fun brother', so that’s not a true statement at all,” Will said. As Jay’s eyes finally started to flutter closed slightly and he rested his full weight against the pillows, Will was able to really look at him for the first time. Every time Will had entered the room, Jay had been asleep, and every time was like a punch to the gut. He had to remind himself that Jay was alright, that he was safe, that they were taking care of him. But it was just nice to see him like this, relaxed and wake, his face and body a mess of scars and cuts and bruises that were too fresh and too vivid, his left side wrapped in slowly soling bandages, his face puffy and dark, his skin red from where Will himself had tenderly wiped the blood away with a wet cloth while Jay was still sleeping and not aware enough to protest to the careful ministrations. It was nice knowing that he was doing better and that he was awake so soon against all odds, but it still hurt to see him laid up in the hospital at all, covered in bandages and tubes and wires and bruises and those horribly itchy hospital blankets that not even Will could vouch for. He hated it, but he knew better than to think he could do anything about it. “But really, jokes aside, are you alright? You look like shit.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I’ve been better,” Jay forced out a laugh, and though it was gritty and raw and not quite there, it still relived some of the tension that had been building up in Will’s chest. “But I’m alright. Not happy about Angela being arrested, but there’s no arguing with Voight when he’s got his mind set on something, and there’s not much I can do about it anyway.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Jay, you know she shot you, right?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Jay shrugged. “I mean, can you blame her? I put her innocent husband behind bars, separated a father from his son, and he died in prison. I probably would have done the same thing if the roles were reversed.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Pursing his lips, Will held back a sigh. “You and I both know that’s not true.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>They fell into a comfortable yet abrupt silence that was only broken by the beeping of the many machines that surrounded Jay’s bedside and the commotion from the hall just past the drawn blinds, the shuffling of feet, soft conversation, receptionists answering phone calls. Jay started straight upwards, blinking lazily at the ceiling and the bright fluorescent light, shifting every now again and wincing at the striking pain from the movement. Will just watched him, glad that he was alive and breathing, and tried to cherish the quiet moment while he had it. It wasn’t often that Jay would let himself be cared for, to be looked after, and it was bad that it took getting kidnapped, tortured, held captive and shot for it to happen, in the hospital no less, but the fact that it was happening at all was a miracle in itself.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“It got really scary for a while there, Jay,” Will broke the silence, leaning forward onto the bed and resting his crossed arms on the blankets, his chin between his fists.  Somehow, as he was speaking, he couldn’t bring himself to look his brother in the eye, even as Jay turned all the way around to watch him. “You lost a lot of blood. Like, a lot of it. And seeing you… I wasn’t sure if I could do it. I couldn’t even look at you without wanting to throw up.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Awh,” Jay joked, and even though Will wasn’t looking, not really, he could still hear the smile in his brother’s voice. “I didn’t think I was that ugly. Either that, or you hate me so much that you can’t stand the sight of me, but-”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Jay, don’t even joke about this. You almost died. You could have died and there would have been nothing I could have done to help you,” Will interrupted and even he was surprised by the sharpness in his tone. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He looked up then and was surprised to see Jay’s eyes soft and understanding, sympathetic almost. But Will didn’t need or want his sympathy. He was here to look after Jay. Not the other way around. “Will, come on. You know that if I had gotten hurt on the job, it wouldn’t have been anyone’s fault but mine. I choose to do this. I chose to sign up for the Rangers, I chose to join Intelligence. Nothing that happens to me is your fault. This is the life I’ve chosen, just as you’ve chosen this one, to be a doctor. And let me tell you, Will, you’re a damn good doctor if I do say so myself. You’ve done more good in this world than I could ever hope to do. So, if we ever reach a point where I get wheeled into Med and there’s nothing you can do to save me, never beat yourself up for it, alright? It’s not your fault, and I could never blame you.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>But Will just shook his head. He shouldn’t be laying all this on his brother, especially not now, but somehow he found that he just couldn’t help himself “I became a doctor for you, Jay. You went off to war, and I did some research, about what might happen, about what you might struggle with when you came back. What you might lose while you were over there. So I became a doctor so I could take care of you and everyone else I cared about, and sure, I was a good doctor back in New York, great even, but I never started to really care about my job until I got to Chicago. Because I got to see you every day, and I saw all the hard work you were doing here, and I wanted to work just as hard, if not harder, as my little brother. The guy saving the world, catching one bad guy at a time. You’ve always been a hero to me, and that’s never changed, never gonna change. But how the hell am I supposed to call myself a good doctor if I can’t even save the person who means the most to me?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Will-”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I wasn’t there when mum got sick, and I know that I should have been, and I’ve never forgiven myself for that. There was nothing I could do for dad. That’s two people I’ve failed, two people I’ve loved and lost,” Will looked away again, but this time, it was to blink the tears out of his eyes. He couldn’t stand the way Jay was looking at him. “I’ve already lost mum and dad. I can’t lose you too.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Will buried his head in the blankets, terrified of what he would see if he met Jay’s eyes for any longer, and was surprised to feel Jay’s hand in his hair, his fingers fisted in the auburn strands, gently rubbing them back and forth, side to side, circular motions like they did when they were kids and everything was sunshine and rainbows and felt a tight fist in his chest slowly unclench at the familiar, soothing motion. “Hey, Will, enough of that man. Come on, look at me. Come on.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Reluctantly, Will lifted his head and wiped the tears that had fallen against his will with the back of his hand. “Sorry. God, look at me. My little brother is literally laid up in a hospital bed after the most harrowing days since the war and I’m over here crying my eyes out and feeling sorry for myself for nothing.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>But Jay was shaking his head even before Will had finished, despite it causing him pain that he tried to hold back, and moved his hands slowly from where they were fisted in Will’s hair to cup one side of his face. “Nah man, I get it. It’s always hard when something like this happens to someone you love. When you were taken by the Ray Burke and his sons, I was so worried that we wouldn’t get you back in time, about what they were doing to you… I don’t know. But I get that sentiment. But you don’t have to worry about me. For the most part, I can take care of myself.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yeah,” Will replied bitterly. “That’s why you’re here right now.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Sighing, Jay looked at Will with a tilted head watching him exhale a shaky breath and look anywhere but at where Jay was lying prone on the bed, beaten half to shit, looking like he had been run over by a semi-truck. He hadn’t looked at himself lately, but he knew that he probably wasn’t very nice to look at, much less for his brother of all people, who Jay tried to stay away from so he didn’t have to see him like this at all. He couldn’t blame Will for finding this difficult. All he knew was that Jay had gone missing and arrived in the hospital close to death, and he had to find some way to make sure Jay made it out of the woods alive. “What a mess we are, huh?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Will bit out a laugh. “The last of the mighty Halstead’s. Look at us now,” Will blinked away tears again, and frustratedly wiped them away with his thumb. “I was really worried about you, Jay. I honestly thought that I was going to lose you.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I’m still here,” Jay assured. “You didn’t lose anyone, Will. Not today, at least.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I know, but I could have. You came so close, Jay. Just…” he sighed, helpless. “I’m not trying to tell you how to do your job, and I would never want you to stop doing something that you love, but the next time you make the decision to run head-first into a dangerous and potentially deadly situation, just think about your poor older brother first, and that I’ll probably be the one taking care of you regardless whatever state you come in with, and if it ever comes to it, I’ll most likely be the one to declare you dead. So please, try not to put either of us in an early grave.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Even though it hurt and every nerve of his body was set alight with the pain, Jay couldn’t help but laugh, and even Will managed a small smile at his brothers reaction. “I mean, I can’t promise anything. I get shot at and run into drug busts and have loaded guns held to my head at least once a week. But yeah, I promise that I’ll at least try and be more careful.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“At least try and think before you act. Just once in a while,” Will joked and Jay snorted.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Awh, you really were worried about me. I thought you were just joking to make me feel bad, but you really do care!” Jay joked.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Will rolled his eyes. “Of </span>
  <em>
    <span>course </span>
  </em>
  <span>I care, you ass.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Satisfied with the end of the conversation, Jay relaxed back against the pillows and blinked back up at the ceiling. His body was screaming at him from how tense he had been for the last few minutes, and he tried to pretend like he wasn’t bothered by it in the slightest, but maybe he made a sound or his face twisted up, or maybe Will just really did know him that well, but he didn’t miss the way his hand snaked out from where it was folded under his chin on the bed to press the morphine button hanging from the IV again as if he could sense Jay’s pain, and his body immediately sunk into the pillows. “You know how much I hate hospitals, Will. I don’t want to be here any more. You’ve got to get me out of here sooner rather than later.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I know man, I know. I can’t do very much around Voight’s back, because unlike you, I value my life,” Will replied. “But I’ll see what I can do. I’m not going to send you home bleeding from the eyeballs, but if I can send you home sooner than I should than I will. It depends on how fast you get better. I’m more than happy to send you out of here in a sling with a few stitches. A few days, a week at most. But you know that even if I get you out of here early, you won’t be going back to active duty until you get the all-clear from the physio, right?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I know,” Jay sighed. “But I’d be happy just getting back to my own place, without all the wires and the needles and the beeping and the nurses waking me up at all hours of the night and the terrible food that tastes like cardboard on a good day.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Tell me about it,” Will laughed. “I always thought that the saying about the hospital food was a myth until I actually started to work in one. I used to buy food from the cafeteria, but that’s just as bad as the mass-produced patient food. I bring my lunch from home now. It’s not worth the pain.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Tell me about it,” Will laughed. “I always thought that the saying about the hospital food was a myth until I actually started to work in one. I used to buy food from the cafeteria, but that’s just as bad as the mass-produced patient food. I bring my lunch from home now. It’s not worth the pain.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“It’s like eating glass shards and bricks,” Jay agreed. “I can’t believe I’ve had so many visitors and not a single one of them have brought me a decent meal. They all know what hospital food is like. I think they just want me to suffer.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Maybe,” Will chuckled. “You tend to surround yourself with sadists and masochists, so I wouldn’t be too surprised if they just left you in here to rot. But don’t worry, I’ll bring you something tomorrow. I’ll head out on my work break or something. But no more shitty hospital food. If that’s something that I can do to make this hospital stay more pleasant for you, then I have no problem with it.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Suddenly exhausted, Jay laughed and felt his eyes flutter close against his volition. “Thanks, Will.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“No worries,” Will said as he watched Jay slowly start to nod off, pulling the blankets up and tighter around his chin, and prepared himself to sleep in the uncomfortable hospital chair with Jay’s snoring shaking the walls, glad to know that, unlike every other sleep Jay's had so far, this one would be natural. “It’s the least I can do for my little brother.”</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Also, off-topic but speaking about the Halstead brothers, I was watching a scene of Chicago Med where Nat gave Will back the engagement ring because he lied to her about having his gun, and I have no context or anything,  and someone in the comments said he was BORN with PTSD while Jay developed it after his time with the Rangers?? And apparently it was easy to google, but I couldn't find a single thing unless it related to Jay's PTSD or the after-affects of his time with the bad guy who's sons kidnapped him to drill a hole in his head, so if anyone knows if that's true as well, can you let me know?? Because that idea is really complex to me and I don't even know how that would work?? But let me know if you can please xx thanks for reading x</p></blockquote></div></div>
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